Super Paper Mario: Dimentio's Return
by BritishWaffleSyrup
Summary: Well, as you probably guessed from the title, Dimentio returns! Whoo! BUT! Will everyone accept him? Hmm... Contains my OC, Emerald. And mostly everyone else. DISCLAIMER: Super Paper Mario is not mine.
1. Aw, Crud, It's The Underhands!

**Hello peeps! This is my first Mario fanfic on THIS account (my other one, I forgot the password to.) So yeah, hope you enjoy! Also, this chapter MIGHT be long, so sorry about that! Ciao!**

**Dimentio: You stole my line. Ahahaha… Now I shall strike, like a cobra on its prey!**

**Me: And… Gotta go!**

_Dimentio's POV_

…_Down… No!...I can't…give up… now…I'm sorry…Truly…_

Dimentio had fallen into the River Twygz- Well, he had actually been pushed. By whom, he did not know. After being sent to the Underwhere, he wandered around the place not caring who he met or where he was going. He felt remorse for what he did, especially trying to hurt his favorite green shape shifter… While he was wandering, he had lost his knack for saying similes. His normal scary smile had drooped. His mask had been cracked in a few places, and his purple and yellow poncho and hat torn in a couple of patches on his arms. After a few minutes of the-what was it, eighth? Ninth? - Day of stumbling around, he came to rest on a dead log near the river. This part of the bank fell straight down into the river, instead of sloping slowly downwards. For a while he had sat there. Without warning, a hand had pushed the jester into the deep part. He stood on the tip of the slope, trying to regain his balance, however, he fell in. The dark water instantly felt like it was sucking him in. Instead of swimming upwards, the detached black-gloved hands flailed weakly in an attempt to pull their owner up, but in vain. He knew what was coming, and what the attacker intended to happen. Feeling a tightening, an Underhand was grabbing him around his waist. A few others of the evil hands, sensing a helpless victim, snaked over and pulled at Dimentio's poncho. But the jester didn't care, considering he was losing oxygen and the world was growing dark- darker than it already was. Just as he was losing consciousness, however, he felt the smaller Underhands swimming away. They had green, glinting, spikes sticking out of them. No, wait… They were arrows! The Underhand holding him, just tightened its grip, determined to not let its victim go. It quickly changed it's mind when, fast as Dimentio could've shot magic bursts, more green gem tipped silver arrows pierced it. Dimentio, not having any fight left in him due to lack of air, faintly saw a figure swimming towards him before becoming unconscious.

_Emerald's POV_

"Hmm. I suppose I could stop in the Underwhere. Dark and gloomy isn't particularly my style. But all the same, it'd be a change in my paintings and sketches!" I chuckled. Mimi laughed too.

"Yeah. There is just one thing though. If you see Dimentio, tell him he's a big dummy head!" Mimi growled. I nodded.

"Will do." Just as I said it, Lord Blumiere and Tippi came in.

"What's this about the Underwhere and Dimentio?" Timpani asked gently.

"Well, Emerald's going there to do a painting of the Underwhere. Hey, that rhymed!" Mimi said, pleased. "And I told her if she sees Dimentio, she should tell him-"

"-That he's a big 'dummy head?'" Lord Blumiere finished.

"Exactly." Mimi replied. Then she turned to me. "Oh, and if you see any Rubees, bring them to me, pretty please?"

I smiled. "Got it. Paint, grab some Rubees, tell Dimentio he's a dummy head, and hightail it out of there before he can shoot magic at me." They all smiled back.

"But," Tippi said, "You will be careful, right?"

"Of course I will, I promise." I said seriously.

"Good." She said happily.

"Ok, well, I've got to go get my art supplies!" I said cheerfully, turning on my heel after saying goodbye to my friends. Teleporting, I arrived at the Mushroom Castle, to tell Mario, Luigi, and Peach where I was going. They wished me farewell, and repeated Tippi's warning about being careful. After leaving, I walked into my room in my three story house I had built in a clearing in the rainforest.

"Hmm…" I said thoughtfully, before selecting a 20 by 24 inch sized canvas and a medium folding easel. After grabbing the canvas and easel, I set them down on my silver fluffy rug and went to work grabbing all the oil paints and sketch pencils. After going through the mental art supply list, I put the paints, pencils, brushes, and palette gently in my scruffy duffel bag, zipped it up, slung it over my shoulder, then picked up the easel and canvas, and finally went to my basement, where I had a selection of doors that took people to different places: Flipside, Flopside, the Underwhere, the Overthere, Gloam Valley- anywhere basically. I grabbed the key to the Underwhere, unlocked the door, and walked inside. There was a loud_ whoosh_ as I was transported from my cold, stone walled basement to the Underwhere. If I had thought my basement was cold, I was corrected as cold, biting, fast winds rushed past me. They gradually decreased until it was simply a chilling breeze.

"Wow. It's cold down here." I shivered unconsciously. A Shayde, I believe they're called, floated up to me.

"Yes," He whispered in a ghostly voice. "It's winter down here. If you ask Charold, the boat driver, he has scarves to sell. For a fee of four coins, he'll also ferry you across the river Twygz."

"Thank you, sir. I'll remember that." I promised. He nodded and floated away. After the short conversation, I found a nice patch of land to sketch. It was several yards away from the river and some Shaydes floated about. I set up my easel, and took out my palette and paints. Squirting some basic paint colors onto the thin, oval, wooden slab, I set it down on the –grass? - Next to me. Then I selected a fine sketch pencil from the few I had brought, and started sketching the landscape.

A couple of hours later, I had finished the outline, painted the inside, added shadows, and now I just had to add the details. As I started, I saw a mysterious figure standing parallel to where I was. I followed his gaze, as he seemed to be looking at something, and I saw a ragged purple and yellow-clothed jester.

"Dimentio…" I muttered. He must have heard me say his name, for he turned his head. However, he only turned it about a centimeter before the mysterious figure shot forward like a flash of lightning would, and shoved the jester into the unforgiving water.

"What the-?" I asked, startled. When Dimentio didn't surface, I realized he was probably too weak to swim. I set down my palette, said armor in Latin, and silver armor with emerald spikes appeared on me. A hunting bow similar to the armor dropped into my ready hands as well. Without hesitation, I aimed at the first Underhand that I could barely see. I kept picking them off, until finally I only saw Dimentio and the large, burly Underhand. Through the dark water, I saw Dimentio slowly closing his eyes.

"Crap…" I muttered. I grabbed three arrows from my case on my back and launched them directly at the beast, being careful to not hit the jester. The weapons met their mark, and they drove into the Underhand's –flesh? The Underhand, deciding to find a different meal, released Dimentio and swam off. I jumped into the water, and was instantly met with a shock of bitter cold. Shaking it off, I propelled myself towards the sinking purple and yellow jester. He had completely lost consciousness, and dragging him up to the surface, him being a dead weight, and dodging the Underhands was no easy task, I can assure you. Eventually, I yanked him and myself up to dry land. I sat there for a few seconds, mulling it over. _'Okay. You just saved an insane jester who tried to kill and destroy everyone and everything. Not to mention betraying his friends. Now what, genius?'_

"Hrm." I muttered, staring at the unconscious body. "Hmph." I decided to pack up my stuff, and return to my house with Dimentio, give him time to think stuff over. Hey, I know it wasn't the best plan, but I honestly couldn't think of anything better. One problem: Dimentio's dead. How am I supposed to get him out? Queen Jaydes. Awesome… But is she going to let him? Is she going to be mad at me for rescuing someone who clearly deserved to meet their fate? I sighed as these thoughts ran through my head. I picked up my paints and pencils, put them into my duffel bag, and placed the bag along with my almost-finished painting and easel against a rock. Running a hand through my hair, not caring about how it looked, I glanced at Dimentio again. Still out cold. I felt like kicking him to wake him up. Not the best idea. I thought back to the spells I had learned, which were few and far in between. One in particular popped up in my mind, a levitating spell. _'Perfect.'_ I chanted the foreign words.

"Ichu canl benoka!" Just like that, an unconscious Dimentio floated upwards, about to my waist, and about a foot from my side. I slung the duffel bag carefully over my shoulder, trying not to spill the oil paints inside. "Well, let's go see Queen Jaydes, Dimentio. Hopefully she won't obliterate us both."

With that, I started up the path to the dark, shadowed castle, whistling cheerfully, a knocked out insane jester floating alongside me, and several Shaydes stopping to stare at us.

**Yup! Second chappie will come a little later, me hopes. Happy almost-Thanksgiving! :D**


	2. Hypothermia

**Hello! I've decided this story's going to be about 15 chapters maximum, 10 minimum. Also, one more thing, this is going to be switching between Dimentio's and Emerald's POV. AND- So, I saw a site that said Dimentio's 3000 years old. I wanted him to be 15 in human years, so I divided 3000 by 15 and I got 200. That means 1 human year is 200 Ancient Tribe years. I don't know. Anyway, enough rambling from me! (I can get a LOT worse than that, trust me.) What was I saying? Oh yeah. Onto the storeh! :D**

_Dimentio's POV_

I could barely make out the shape of three figures. I could also hear them conversing, but I couldn't hear well enough to hear what they were actually saying. One was a tall person, wearing a large-spiked crown. Next to her was a fluttering shape, with, I think, heart-shaped wings. I groaned as I realized who they were. The three figures glanced at me and stopped talking for a moment. Then they turned back to each other and continued talking. I strained to see the third figure. I figured out she was a girl, maybe as old as I am. She appeared to have armor on, and had a hunting bow with arrows strapped to her back. At each hip were ninja stars, as well as a katana in its sheath at her left side. On her wrist bracers, there was a rope coiled up tightly, with two small grappling hooks attached. _'A ranger. No. A ninja? A warrior? Who knows?' _I thought, confused. Then a new thought came through my head. _'Maybe she's the one who saved me.'_ Then I passed out again.

_Emerald's POV_

"I brought him here so he could be released from the Underwhere, yes." I replied shifting my favored duffel bag. Queen Jaydes and Luvbi looked at me like I was nuts. Which I probably was.

"But why?" The Queen asked. "In my honest opinion, you should have left him to drown."

"That's what I would have done too." I said. "But I saw his diary, and there was a list of five things he wanted to do before he died. I know it may seem non-imperative, but some of them were quite touching." The Queen thought about this for a second.

"If they really are touching, as you say, he may be released."

I nodded. "If that's what you want." Suddenly, Dimentio groaned. We looked over at him, and saw he had been looking at Queen Jaydes and Luvbi. His eyes were barely open, as if it was a struggle to keep them like that.

"Well, here's the diary." I said, passing it to the Queen. "The list is on page 43." Queen Jaydes opened it to said page, and while she read, Luvbi asked me,

"How did thou acquire the jester's book?"

"He had it on him when I had pulled him out of the water." I replied.

"Ah. Why did the jester jump?" She asked.

"He didn't jump, someone pushed him." I answered, raising an eyebrow.

"That is not good. Thou must tell my mother."

"Okay. I believe Dimentio can be redeemed." Queen Jaydes interrupted. "His diary shows that he did have some goodwill left in him."

"Oh mother, that is good news. But there is something the warrior must tell thou." Luvbi said, looking upset.

"Yes?" Jaydes asked me, handing the book back.

"When I was painting, I saw a mysterious figure standing several feet behind Dimentio." I said, placing the diary in my magic satchel that sat near my blade. "I watched as the figure darted, quicker than a lightning bolt, and shoved Dimentio into the water. After that, well, I was too busy attacking the Underhands to notice where the attacker went."

The Queen nodded. "Very well. I will think this over. Now," She said, turning to Dimentio. "I suppose I will have to grant this fool his life back. I'll send his body to your house."

"Thank you, Queen Jaydes." I bowed.

"You are quite welcome." With a wave of her hand, a green aura glowed brightly around the purple and yellow clad jester. "His game has resumed. Now I will send him." With another wave, he disappeared to my house. I thanked the Queen one more time, said goodbye to Luvbi, and turned to leave. "One more thing, Emerald was it?" The Queen stopped me. I nodded, and she continued, "Don't hesitate to tell your friends Dimentio's alive. They'll be madder if they find out you kept it from them." I paused at the words. Then I cleared my thoughts and said, "Okay. I'll heed your advice." The Queen smiled.

"Good girl. Now go home." I teleported out to Castle Bleck to tell my friends why it had taken so long to paint, taking my bag with me. However, I left the jester out of the story. I told them about the mysterious figure, and told them the part of the truth about going to see Queen Jaydes about it. They understood, and so did Mario, Luigi, and Princess Peach. After teleporting so much and talking, I grew weary and made one final teleportation to the front of my house. Sighing, I walked in.

"Man, what a day." I had completely forgotten that Dimentio was in my house, so when I saw the insane jester-_STILL-_ passed out onto my couch, I jumped about a foot in the air. Then I remembered and smacked myself upside the head. "Stupid. Wait… Why is he still out of it? He only ran out of oxygen for a small while." I cautiously walked over to him. His clothes had dried off, as if they hadn't been wet at all. Must've been some sort of magic spell. Nudging him with my hand, he stirred but did not get up. It was then that I realized how cold he was, and he was shivering as well. "Hmm." I mumbled. I pried his mask off, and gasped. His seemingly human face was covered in blue. _'Hypothermia.'_

"Crap! I need to get him some dry blankets or something." I muttered. I ran upstairs to the third floor, where the closet was with all the thick blankets. I grabbed a few, and rushed back down to the hypothermic jester. I covered him with them, and placed his mask back on. Suddenly remembering that you're not supposed to cover the arms or legs- Wait. He doesn't have any. I facepalmed.

"Well. I suppose I'll just not cover his hands and feet then." I said rolling my eyes and shrugging. I went to my medical cabinet in my kitchen and looked through the box.

"Let's see here, thermometer… pills for headaches, nope, Tylenol, nope… a Twilight DVD multipack!? What the FUDGE?! Get OUT OF HERE, DEMON!" With that I threw the evil DVDs into the fireplace. The flames shot high and red, and I could have sworn I heard a demonic voice laughing.

"_**I was the one who took your cookies… They were delicious! MWHAHAHAHA- *Cough cough*"**_

"Well then. I made more anyway!" I yelled at the fire. I muttered darkly to myself, then found the thermometer and went over to Dimentio. Taking his temperature, I found it was 98.6 degrees Fahrenheit. "Perfect temperature. Wait, isn't he a member of the Tribe of Darkness? WHAT'S THEIR NORMAL TEMPERATURE?!" Groaning irritably, I walked to a wall with a bookshelf, pulled a certain book, and the wall swung open to reveal a tunnel slick with butter. I jumped down, and the wall closed behind me. "WHEEE!" I yelled throwing my hands up in the air. I fell out the end of the tunnel and landed on my feet. I had arrived in my massive underground library. Picking myself up, I walked over to a bookshelf and pulled out several books on the Tribe of Darkness. They were huge, and when I opened them up, there were no Table of Contents, no Index, no Glossary.

"This may take a while…"

Several hours later, I finally found the temperature in the back of the seventh book. "98.5? Are you kidding me?! It took several hours just to find out it was a TENTH difference?!" I felt like throwing the book across the room. I didn't. I threw the table. I teleported to the living room where the unconscious Dimentio lay on the couch. Suddenly, his eyes fluttered open.

"Huh? I am confused… like a cow being taken to the slaughterhouse."

**Okay… About that last part, with the sillies and stuff, I got bored of being serious! Who doesn't?! Plus, Twilight and Tylenol ARE NOT MINE. Nor is Super Paper Mario. If Twilight was mine, I'd fire the producers and hire ones who worked on **_**Die Hard. **_**The one with all the explosions.**__**Which isn't mine either. :****I**


	3. Waking Up

**Why, hello peoples! Happy Thanksgiving! I can't believe they don't have it in my home country, England. Speaking of holidays they don't have, like 4****th**** of July… Well, they DO have Guy Fawkes Day. Sticking firecrackers down toilets is always fun! Not that I've ever done it. I'm a goody-two-shoe. Anyway… Yeah, so here's the next chappie!**

_Dimentio's POV_

The first thing I was aware of was that I was covered with something heavy, warm, and fluffy. The second was that there was a person standing near me, muttering something. I opened my eyes slowly.

"Huh? I am confused… like a cow being taken to the slaughterhouse." It took me a few seconds to realize I had just uttered a simile. The person walked over to me, and I recognized her as the armored girl.

"Ya feel better?" She asked gently. She had long, shiny brown hair that also had green streaks, and reached her waist, and it was swept back in a ponytail. Her eyes were a luminous emerald, and she had soft facial features. She was smiling, showing her pearl-white teeth. I noticed they were a little sharp. Her armor, I noticed, wasn't on her person. Instead she wore a silk green shirt, a pair of jeans, and some socks. Also, she had a silver necklace with an emerald embedded in it.

"Yes… I am feeling good. Pardon my asking, but who might you be?" I asked, coughing a little. Then I asked a little disappointedly, "Are you a princess?"

The girl laughed. "I'm Emerald. I'm the one who rescued you, blah blah blah. And yeah-freaking-right. Do I LOOK like I'm wearing a crappy girl dress? Or a 'pretty' crown? Heck, I'm as much of a princess as Bowser."

"No, you most certainly do not." I laughed slightly. "Speaking of Bowser… Do you know anyone associated with him? Or perhaps a past enemy?" I asked, kind of dreading the answer. Emerald's smile faded when she saw the slight panic in my eyes.

"Yes… But the good news is I haven't told them you're here. I know you must be nervous, considering you betrayed them." She nodded. "No offense."

"None taken. At least they don't know I'm alive yet." I replied. Then I saw her thinking about something, and I took a wild guess. "I realize you're going to tell them at some point."

Sure enough, when the words left my mouth she relaxed. "Okay, good." Emerald smiled. Just then, my stomach rumbled. We both looked at each other. "Dim? –May I call you that? - What was the last thing you ate?"

I smiled sheepishly, like a student caught passing notes. "Uh… I can't remember?"

Emerald rolled her eyes. "Well, I'll go get you something then." I grinned my usual smile.

"I don't mean to be a burden, like a large, bulky package waiting for the mailman to deliver."

"Pssh. I've had sick guests here before." She called from the kitchen. "Nothing I can't handle. By the way, what do want to eat and drink?"

I looked at the clock. 12:27pm. "If it's no worry-"

"Nope!"

"-Then could I please have a fried shroom plate and mango juice?"

"Coming right up." Emerald replied. I could hear the sound of the pan sizzling as she put the cooking oil and mushrooms on. The smell wafted in soon after the sound. My stomach growled softly. To put my mind off the food for a while, I looked around the house. The walls were a type of light wood, with white paint and paintings covering it. The sofa I was sitting on had a couple of cushions decorated with detailed dragons. In front of me was a large glass coffee table, with sketchbooks and pencils neatly arranged. There was a large stone fireplace, and photos in delicate silver frames atop it. Behind the sofa was a spiral staircase, leading up to the second or third floor.

"I like the décor. By the way, are you an artist?" I asked. Emerald walked back in, holding the food and drinks.

"Thank you. I decorated it with artwork after I built the house. I guess that kind of explains the question." She grinned, showing her unusually pointed teeth.

'_Fangs?'_ I wondered. "Yes, it is quite exquisite, like an ice statue standing in a foyer of a castle."

"Thanks. Here's your food then." She said, sitting down on the arm of the sofa to eat her own food- a fried egg and sky juice. She passed my tray with the mushrooms and a glass of mango juice. The glass appeared to be made of emerald, and had a dragon etched into it. I took a sip, and the wonderful, creamy, exotic taste filled my mouth. It took all of my composure not to down the glass in one gulp. Next, I poked my fork into one of the mushrooms and ate it. It was crunchy, but not burnt, just the way I liked it.

"That was delicious." I said happily after swallowing the last mouthful of mushroom, and drinking the last of my mango drink.

"Glad you liked it." Emerald said, taking a bow. "Wow. It's dark already. Where do you want to sleep?"

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Do you want to sleep on the couch or in the guest bedroom?" She asked, rolling her eyes.

"I think I'll sleep in the guest bedroom." I replied, standing up and picking up the tray with me. Emerald took the tray out of my hands, and stacked it on top of hers.

"I'll do it. You need rest, dude."

I nodded, just now realizing how tired I was. "Ok. You're right. I'll go up to bed then." I tried to float up, but only got several inches into the air. I picked up the blankets, and drifted off towards the staircase. "Goodnight, Emerald."

"G'night, Dim." Came the reply from the kitchen, along with the sound of silverware and cutlery being put in the dishwasher. I floated up the staircase, and saw the second floor. It was… beautiful. Lovely structures of animals, suits of armor, houses, glasses of lemonade- anything you could imagine carved and made of precious gems and metals. I hovered there for a second, amazed. Then I remembered my fatigue and kept going up the stairs. I finally reached the third floor. This was basically a hallway, with four doors. One was painted blue, with a photo hanging in a silver frame, the photo showing a sketch of a detailed bath. Another had the same thing, but with a bed with the words: Emerald's Room-Knock first. The third door was smaller in width then the others, and when I opened it I saw it was a heater. I closed it, and looked at the fourth door. It had a photo with a silver frame like the others, and was showing a bed with the words: Guest Bedroom. I turned the handle and drifted in. I saw a normal wooden bed, with a white quilt, sheet, and pillows, and by that was a bedside table with a lamp. There was also a recliner with a rug facing a TV and gaming console. There was a mini fridge plugged into the wall as well. Photos were placed along the wall in no particular order. There was an in-built closet as well, and opposite the bed was a set of shelves with books, CDs', and magazines. There was a laundry hoop and basket as well. The room was about medium-sized.

"This is quite an amazing house." I whispered to myself, and then flopped onto the bed, not bothering to change into pajamas. I turned off the lamp, and soon fell asleep.

**Done! How do you like it so far? R&R please! With a cherry on top?**


	4. Possible Demon

**S'up?! I come back! I'm sorry I haven't updated in AGES, it's just I left on a 10-day vacation, and I had writer's block… Please forgive me peoples! :D Here's this chapter first though! P.S. THERE WILL BE CEREAL PUNS. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.**

_Dimentio's POV_

I opened my eyes to see sunlight streaming through the window. Outside was the soft squawking and chattering of toucans and monkeys. I tucked aside the white, thick covers, and hopped out of bed. I stretched, then yawned, and jumped into the air to float down the stairs. I drifted down the spiral stairs, pausing to admire the carved statues placed around the second floor's large room briefly, and then continued my trek. I arrived in the kitchen, and my eyes swept across the room. There was a kitchen island carved out of amber, with a white marble base supporting it. The cupboards were made out of mahogany, and had designs etched into them. I looked at the oval shaped table. It had a white table cloth with a pattern of leaves sewn on. There were several chairs fluffed with cushions for seats, and each cushion had a name painted on in different colors and handwriting, as well as a handprint below it. Floating around, I read out the names painted on.

"Mimi, Nastasia, Tippi, Lord Blumiere… When did the Lord and Lady get back? Hm. Mario, Peach, Bowser, O'Chunks, Luigi, Emerald, and Mr. L," I wondered about how Mr. L got back. While I was thinking, a slight rustle caught my attention. I turned and noticed a piece of notebook paper fluttering on the fridge, a palm tree magnet sticking it on. I just then noted the fridge. It was huge, with a HD plasma TV screen stretched across the fridge door. On the freezer door was an ice cube dispenser, with crushed, normal, or pattern settings.

"Impressive, like a docile rabid panther," I simile'd. I plucked the note from under the tropical magnet, and scanned it over. "Emerald left to go shopping, and there's a surprise in my bathroom. Ahahaha, how kind, 'There's cereal in the cupboard,'" I decided I'd eat, then go look at what the surprise was. I floated off to the cupboard, opening it without one creak. "Lucky Shrooms… Cocoa Cheep-Cheeps… Rice Koopas… I think I'll go with the Lucky Shrooms. They have Magi-mellows in them." Selecting the box, I grabbed a ruby-carved bowl and poured the cereal and some milk directly from Moo-Moo Meadows into the carved creation. I went to sit down when I realized there was no chair for me to sit in. However, when I looked again I saw an empty chair. Slowly, my name was painted in glowing purple and yellow letters. I was surprised to find it was in my own neat cursive. I placed my gloved palm on it in wonder, and when I pulled it back, I let out a soft gasp as my imprint had been left in glowing black paint. The glow from the writing and print subsided after a moment, and when I touched it, it seemed perfectly dry, as if it had been laying there for about an hour.

"Strange," I grinned, "but amazing." I started to munch on the delicious cereal.

_Emerald's POV_

I walked around Toad Town, not actually knowing what I'd buy. Toads of all colors wandered past me, stopping to pause at market stalls and shops. "I probably need to buy extra clothes for Dimentio," I thought to myself.

I strolled into a huge clothes store. And when I say huge, I mean HUGE. I never liked shopping, but this store put me in awe. It was strange, because on the outside it looked like a normal, one-story clothes shop. While I was staring, someone floated up to me. Yes, I said floated.

"Hello there… How are you today misss?"

I turned around, and saw someone strange. His structure was that of a human, except he was hovering and had no arms, just hands. He had scales, and one red snake eye with a black slit for a pupil, the other eye pitch black with a red scar slashed vertically through. His scales were red, with a glossy shine. He had a strange grin, with a forked pink tongue that hissed through his gleaming white fangs occasionally. He wore black and red merchant clothes.

"Hi, I'm fine, thank you." I said warily. This guy reminded me of a demon, creatures I had experience of.

"What isss your name?" He inquired.

"Emerald."

"Ahahahaha… Of courssse… Now, what were you looking for in Fang'sss Fine Tailor, Misss Emerald?" He asked, floating off towards a rack of shirts with his back turned to me. I noticed, underneath the highly pronounced 's' sounds, he had an Italian accent.

"Actually, I was looking for something for my friend." I said firmly.

"Really? Who isss your friend?" He said, rifling through the rack. I guess he was organizing it.

"His name is Dimentio." The strange person froze, and after a few seconds hissed lowly. He spun around, his face a mask of anger.

"Dimentio? The Dimentio?" He hissed quickly. I facepalmed mentally. "He tried to destroy the worlds, idiot!" My thoughts yelled at me.

"No… I mean… Uh,"

The reptile's face flickered. Then his grin flew back, and he said, "Don't worry, Misss Emerald. It'll be our little sssecret. Now… I think I have sssomething to fit our friend, Dimentio." He went behind the desk, went inside a room, and came back with a white and black hooded robe. There were two silver bracers laying on top of the pile, as well as two boots.

"And, thissss assss well, ssshould he need it." He held out something shiny and small. I took it cautiously and looked it over. It was a small, gleaming tablet. "It cleansss clothessss 256 timesss each wasssh. Do you want the tablet and robe?"

"I guess so. Thank you, Mr. …?

"Jussst call me Fang." He hissed, still smiling. "It'll be five gold coinsss, pleassse." I placed the precious metal coins in the scaly Fang's hand, noting it had claws.

"Have a nice day, Emerald." He smiled.

I nodded, and fast-walked out. I could hardly wait to get out of there. I'd fought demons before, the scary thing was, he resembled Dimentio. He seemed furious when I mentioned Dim's name. Why? I struggled to put it together. Sighing, I teleported home.

_Dimentio's POV_

I turned over the cool object once more, examining it. After breakfast I had gone up to my surprise. I had found a purple box with a yellow ribbon waiting for me on the edge of my bathtub. Opening it, I discovered a figure of me made out of jewels and precious metals. The purple was carved out of amethyst, the yellow gold, my shoes, leggings, half of the side of my mask was onyx, and the white was opal. I noticed my mouth was formed into smiling, not my creepy grin, but a true, honest smile.

I felt my own mouth forming that same smile.

Suddenly, I heard someone knocking on the door rapidly. I floated down the stairs, and opened the green painted door. "Hello- Oh hello, Emerald, back from shopping…" I faltered when I saw her worried face. "What's wrong?" I asked, as she gently nudged past me. I closed the door.

"Dim?"

"Yes…?"

"Did you ever have a brother?"

**Mwahahahahahaha, cliffhanger! :D Hope you enjoyed. **


	5. 4th Wall Breaking, Cheep-Cheep McBites

**Hello peoples! Como estas? I feel extra happy today, so I decided to write another chappie! Whoo! :D Especially cause' I just left you guys with a cliffhanger before! Yay for exclamation marks! :D DISCLAIMER: I do not own McDonald's Fish McBites, Toy-R-Us, or Nintendo. Why? I have no idea. Yes. :) Pancakes... AND SQUIRTY CHEESE!**

_Dimentio's POV_

My stomach froze. "W-what?"

Emerald ushered me over to the couch. I sank into the cushions gratefully, and she sat down beside me.

"He said his name was Fang?" She inquired. "Is that his name, if he is your brother?"

"He's my brother, all right, actually my twin, but that's just the name he wanted to be called. Most likely because he has the ability to turn into a were-snake. His real name is… Mortisio." I growled. I didn't usually get angry, but my brother was enough to make it happen.

"Mortisio… Mortis means 'death' in Latin." Emerald muttered.

"Yes. Where was he and what was he doing?" I asked, a bit curious now. Well, it was more suspicion than curiosity.

"He was at a store in Toad Town; it was called 'Fang's Fine Tailor.' He just floated up behind me and asked me what I was doing. I told him I was looking for some clothes for a friend…" Emerald trailed off, and made an awkward gesture in the air.

My face drained of all color under the mask. "You told him my name, didn't you?"

"Accidently."

I groaned.

"Sorry! I completely forgot." She said. "But he promised he'd keep it a secret. The only thing was, he sort of reminded me of a demon. The snake appearance, red and black colors, the claws and fangs."

"I'm certain he's a demon of sorts. In his normal wear, it's the same as my jester clothes except red and black instead of purple and yellow." I breathed out, and then grinned as a thought struck me. "Did he still have a scar on his eye?"

Emerald looked slightly confused. "Yeah, I vaguely remembered one. Why?"

"When we were ten, I accidently slashed him with a butcher knife while I was chopping some Muth roast. Mortisio was irking me, and I meant to push him away with my free hand, but cut him instead. The amusing part was he hates hospitals, and he went to a huge one." I recounted, grinning evilly.

"Lovely!" Emerald laughed, shoving me playfully. "So, was he evil when he was born, or what?"

I thought. "I believe so."

"Weird. Well, anyways, did you like the gift I made?" She asked.

"It's amazing." I said, pulling it out of my pocket. "How long did it take you to carve it?"

"Only a short while. I went to the treasure chest in my room, which had some gems and ores already in it." Emerald replied, smiling like the rising sun as its rays touched the earth.

"Thank you, Emerald." I grinned, and then let out a breath as Emerald hugged me with spine-cracking strength.

"You're welcome!" She laughed.

"That's… nice, but… you're breaking my… spine-ack!"

"Oh, sorry, Dim. Sometimes I don't know my own strength!" Emerald laughed.

"You have that right." I chuckled, rubbing my vertebrae. Then Emerald pulled out a bundle of white.

"Oh by the way, by the way, Mortisio gave me these robes for you, and some random tablet that washes clothes 256 times. OH I JUST GOT THAT REFERENCE!"

I facepalmed. "Thank you. Wait, how do you know the robes aren't cursed?" I asked, unfolding them and trying to hide the impressment off my mask as I thought how long it must have taken him to create them.

"Well, turns out they WERE, but I stopped at Un-Curses-R-Us and had the spells removed."

*FLASHBACK*

_Some Random High-Ranking Employee's POV_

"Well, bye, thank you very much sir!" The armored teen walked out with the now twinkling robes.

"You're welcome! Have a nice day!" I called, smiling, waited until she walked out completely, then groaned loudly and slumped against a wall. "And never come back again…"

"What's wrong sir?" A small, yellow capped toad ran up to me. "Problems?"

"Hmm, let's see… Trying to get 51 different curses out of a robe, one of them that spawns giant Muths everywhere, another that explodes me in a red phantom box, is a tad bit of a problem, yes Jenkins."

"Point taken sir."

"Good. Took me five bleedin' hours…" I grumbled, walking away, flicking a bit of ash and Muth poop off my blue and white spotted cap.

*FLASHBACK OVER!*

"Ah. I see." I chuckled. Then my stomach growled again. Emerald stood up, grinned at me, and then backed away slowly, still facing me with that grin. "What?" I asked.

When she was in the middle of the kitchen, she pulled out two McDonald's Happy Meals out of thin air. Then aimed one at me.

"Uh-oh."

She threw the bag at me. Thinking quickly, I jumped up off the couch and snapped my fingers. A yellow box appeared around the meal, trapping it in mid-air. I held out my hand and bag dropped into my outstretched glove. This took about five seconds.

"Why did you throw that at me?" I inquired half-curiously, half-weirded out by her antics, pulling the meal towards me and peering inside- a box of six Cheep-cheep McBites and a packet of fries.

"Half for funsies and half to check your reflexes. What if Mortisio was going to attack us right now? You did good by the way."

"Good point well made, like a scholar owning a thief in a good mystery book, and thank you." I replied. Emerald bowed, while I popped a Cheep-cheep McBite into my mouth. "These are delicious!"

"I know, right? Have you seen the commercial with the Cheep-cheeps? Tis' HILARIOUS!" Emerald laughed.

"I haven't, no." I replied, amused. Emerald grabbed my wrist and yanked me towards the computer with the same bone-breaking strength as before.

"Well, c'mon then! I'll show you!" She grinned, and slammed the PC on. When it turned on, she yelled, "IT'S ALIVE! ALIIIIVEEEE!"

*5 Hours Later…*

I was lying in my bed, asleep. I was dreaming I was in Castle Bleck's foyer. I had just floated in, and was just about to call out to my old friends, when some people- no, SIX people walked out of the never-ending shadows. I started, and then looked closer. Lord Blumiere, Lady Timpani, O'Cabbage- er, O'Chunks, Mimikins, Mr. L, and Nastasia.

"You guys! First off, I apologize for-" I was cut off by a low growl from Lord Blumiere. They dropped onto all fours, transforming into the structure of wolves, and started advancing. I paled and backed away. "What the…" Suddenly, a voice sneered in my ear.

"What's wrong, Dim? Scared of the puppies?" The familiar voice whispered evilly. I whipped around- and glared at the mask of evil.

"Hello, Mortisio. What did you do NOW?" I said through clenched teeth, gesturing to my friends, no, family who were still growling.

"Ahahahahahaha… Turned them into something you may find very soon…" My twin smirked.

"Shut up with the riddles, and tell me what you're talking about!" Mortisio winked and then the dream shattered.

I woke up gasping, and then grasped my blankets in fright as I heard an eerie, loud howl echo across the wet forest. Thunder boomed, and lightning flashed soon after, striping dark shadows and light across the room. I looked outside shakily, pulling apart the white curtains. I watched as a silver streak flashed crosswise the forest floor. That wasn't the only thing I noticed, though. I noticed the moon was full, as well.

Gasping for breath, I slammed open my door, rushed over to Emerald's, and knocked repeatedly.

"Emerald! Can you open the door please!?" I yelled.

Silence.

I opened the door, and looked upon the room. It had a marvelous statue of an angel carved out pearl, its' glittering robes throwing all sorts of colors around the room. That wasn't what I was concentrating on, however. I stared at the empty bed, the quilt thrown aside.

A growl came from the doorway, and I turned my head slowly. A silver furred, yellow eyed were-wolf crouched in the door frame, with Emerald's armor on.

"Didn't you see the sign? Knock first, dude." And then, I passed out. Heroic, hmm?

The next morning, I opened my eyes. And saw a certain silver were-wolf sitting in the recliner, playing Call of Duty. I stared at it. It glanced up at me. "Oh, you're awake. Good morning!" Then the beast, in a flash of light, turned into Emerald, who proceeded to make a "derp" face, I believe it's called.

"Emerald? You're a werewolf?" I asked curiously. "You scared the living daylights out of me!"

"I know. Sorry 'bout that! And, I'm actually a God-hound. I'm an agent for Heaven, and travel around worlds, dimensions, and universes to help peoples. I am a good guy, and I fight demons, vampires, and ghouls. And, if I'm lucky, hell-hounds."

"…I just woke up. Wait until I have coffee, please." I groggily replied, head spinning at these new facts.

*Somewhere on Fire*

_Third Person Limited_

Mortisio leapt through the portal with cat-like stealth. Craning his neck to a high, black, spiked rock formation surrounded by lava, he crouched, shot out his wings, and soared high above the lava pools. Landing on the ledge, he slammed a clawed hand onto a button, and a slab of rock slid beside him to reveal a tunnel. Sliding down it, he arrived in a roomy cave. He opened a chest and grabbed a deer haunch, and ripped of a piece of cooked flesh with his fangs. Still chewing, he walked over to a map.

"Brother… You and your little angel friend are going down, that I can promissse… without lying. Ahahahaha… Becausssse I'm a demon? I lie? Do you readersss get it? Mwhaha…"

Then I (the authoress) slammed open the rock slab and punched the 4th wall breaking butthead in the face. "YOU BROKE THE 4th WALL! AND DON'T HARASS THE READERS!"

Then several other characters came and joined in beating the goat midget up, and THEN the 4th wall portal came and sucked up Mortisio. Yay!

**Om nom nom! Do worry: Mortisio will probably be back. And he's not amused. So, a magic demon and two minions of his try to walk into a bar. How do they do it?**

**Mr. L.: I dunno. Ask the rabbi! :D**

**Me: HOW DID YOU GET HERE?!**

**Mr. L: The rabbi is still waiting for your questions.**

**Me: I'm not Jewish! I don't hate/dislike peoples who are though.**


End file.
